Sunday, August 8, 2010

A Legend in His Own Mind-28

November, 1983

Dear Lázaro,

Since my participation in Buffo's show had been so drastically diminished, I had to get involved with other stuff quickly. I joined Panorámico. It's a Spanish language theatre group. Luckily they do some things in English or else I would have to be a mime.

First day of class I'm greeted at the door by Euphoria. She has this wild looking long black hair that she tosses all over the place. She grabs me and takes me to the dressing room. She proceeds to tell me that she needs me to do a class exercise with her.

"Something really dramatic! Rape! No. I was raped last week. I got it! You can kill me! I've never died before."

Right there she created this impromptu scene where I am her ex-boyfriend and in a jealous fit I strangle her and drag her dead body by the hair across the stage. Well in the middle of this scene, Thespia, the director, yells out to stop. It seems that Euphoria neglected to tell me that last week she had dislocated her hip.

I became real close friends with her. We were even neighbors. She's a bit of a free spirit. Like this one time I took her to one of my aerobics lessons and found out that she doesn't wear underwear. Unfortunately I discovered this at the same time as my students.

Another time she was holding a pissing contest at the beach with three guys. Afterwards she needed to spend the night with someone until her mother's dress dried.

We were doing a production of what Thespia called "Representational Theatre." It was a series of monologues with song and dance interspersed. You know I was dance. Anyway, all of the performers are on stage the entire time and Euphoria was one of the last ones to speak. She had to maintain her concentration and she chose to do it by being on her knees, constricting her face and twisting her hands in a severe arthritic attack. I was up on a platform overlooking her. It was so hard for me to keep my concentration 'cause she looked so constipated.

Arcadia got mad at me the other day. See she and I have been organizing a bon voyage party for Aurora. She's going back to Uruguay. Arcadia wanted to hire a Strip-O-Gram but the restaurant said no. I tried to explain to her that that kind of entertainment might be offensive to the other patrons. She said that I just didn't want Aurora to have a good time.

We finally settled on Prince Charming. Unfortunately they sent one that looked like Dom De Luise. I thought he was hysterically funny. Aurora loved him. Arcadia was fit to be tied. I could see the smoke twirling out of her ears.

Romero went to bid farewell to Aurora and later informed me that he came without Rumba in case we could get together later. I surprised myself but I turned him down. I have always been such a wimp when it comes to sweet talking, hard loving sexy Latin boys. But I really felt he was using Rumba and me for his own gratification. He certainly was gratifying but I wasn't feeling magnanimous.

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